Beests

There has been a name stuck in my head for some time now. I figured 
I should write it out. 'Melittsophex Berensis'-a bee found in amber in a 
mine in northern Myanmar. In fact, the oldest bee ever found, over
100 million years old. Sounds exotic, doesn't it? Just imagine the queen 
bee yelling, 'Melittsophex, get your ass over here, I've got work for you, 
beetch!!'

Did you know that 3300 bees were sent to outer space on one of the 
space shuttle missions to see how they reacted to zero gravity? They 
adjusted immediately and built a pure and clean honeycomb hive, and 
I do say pure and clean because there is one thing in space the bees 
apparently would not do. Poop. Bees don't poop in their hives because
bees haven't come up with technology yet like indoor plumbing, so they 
keep their hives clean of poop. They poop outside. And since they
were encased in space, they were observed to have held it in for seven 
to nine days before being released into the wild to have, literally,
a poopy party.

Bees are also able to recognize patterns. Tests of human facial pictures 
were shown to bees and the one picture dabbed with sugar and honey
is the one picture they always came back to. Granted, that is just 
memory recall, but the pictures were even disheveled and still produced 
the same results, however, when the pictures were placed upside down, 
the bees became flustered, just like most humans do. The truth is that 
they do not recognize Johnny Rimbauld's face, just the pattern. Bees also 
see ultraviolet light, which humans unfortunately do not, so imagine the 
ultraviolet patterns these bees must see everyday as they flit around.

Rumors have been swirling that when the honeybee goes, so shortly 
thereafter does the human race. There are scientists who believe this 
true and some think it just a beestly hoax. Honeybees actually do
a lot more for the environment than most people in the world are 
aware, but no one knows for sure if it is their actions that have kept 
us going through this hard economic phase of life.

Did you also know that most queen bees lay roughly between 600 
and 1400 eggs... a day!!??!!??!!?? A day??  That means she is also 
laying around, if you know what I mean, wink wink. Come here little 
Melittsophex and show me what you got in your hummer!!!! Can you
dream the human female birthing 1000 times a day. A nightmare 
actually. Talk about overpopulation, and talk about pain!

Bees are a helluva commodity in our world.